I was at a café the other week and a mediocre singer-songwriter started to perform. In between each song, she would tune her guitar slowly and painfully. She even explained her lack of an electronic tuner by saying, "Use a tuner and you lose your ears." Um, yeah, but if you don't use a tuner, you lose your audience.
It's weird to hear a performer tell you they are purposefully doing something painful to you because it's good for them. "After this song, I'm going to stab you repeatedly...because it'll be really great for my triceps!" Great! Is there anything else that I, as an audience member, can do for you? Gee-sus.
Sandpaper Suit is NYC standup comic Matt Ruby's (now defunct) comedy blog. Keep in touch: Sign up for Matt's weekly Rubesletter. Email mattruby@hey.com.
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