Cat whiskers automatically grow to the width of the cat. When faced with a small opening, the whiskers tell the cat if there's enough room to fit its whole body.
I like that. Someday I dream of being really fat. Like so fat that I can't fit through some doorways.
When that day arrives, I will grow a handlebar mustache* that is as wide as my body is fat. And I will stick my giant handlebar mustache into doorways in order to see if the rest of me will fit. Nature!
* I guess it doesn't have to be a handlebar mustache. But it just seems like the classy way to go.
Sandpaper Suit is NYC standup comic Matt Ruby's (now defunct) comedy blog. Keep in touch: Sign up for Matt's weekly Rubesletter. Email mattruby@hey.com.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Moving on/Subscribe to my newsletter
I only post on rare occasions here now. Subscribe to my Rubesletter (it's at mattruby.substack.com ) to get jokes, videos, essays, etc...
-
Even the best standups seem to just scrape by. Then you hear about a guy who got a late night writing gig. Pay's nice. Long hours but he...
-
Never been to a Letterman taping. But I've heard the studio is chilly due to Dave's orders. Was talking about it the other day with ...
-
Patton Oswalt preaches love instead of hate in standup. “Actually, I think when you’re younger, anger and comedy mesh together very, very w...
No comments:
Post a Comment